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Happy Friday, everybody!  It’s the weekend, and you know what that means – time to figure out what you’ll be doing while staying inside the house this weekend!

Um… okay, so that’s what I’LL probably be doing – hopefully, the rest of you will be going out on dates, drinking expensive wines and eating all kinds of expensive cheeses. (I’d do the same, but I’m lactose intolerant – cheese doesn’t mix too well in my stomach…)

Now that the site is up and running, I’ve actually had people writing me and asking me for dating advice. To be honest, I’m kind of shocked – not that (more…)

Hey everybody! It’s another wonderfully glorious Non Juan day for me!

Well, at least I HOPE it is. It’s got to be better than YESTERDAY’s wallet fiasco. Those of you who follow me on my twitter page (@NonJuan) know what I’m talking about; for those of you who don’t know the story….

TOO BAD!! SHOULDA BEEN FOLLOWING ME AT TWITTER.COM/NONJUAN! Doo doo-doo doo-dooo…

Oh, okay, I’ll share the story with you, too… but just this ONE time!

Basically, what had happen was, I was trying to hit on this cute girl at the store (I complimented her on her sexy nose hairs), and she ended up calling the cops on me. I hid in a dumpster to avoid being seen by the police; when I finally got out of the dumpster, I realized I was hungry, and needed something to eat.

Unfortunately, I had NO idea where I was, and everyone in the part of town I was in only spoke Spanish! I mean, I know a lil’ bit of Spanish (mostly from latin girls who always yell “Adios, creepo” at me), but not enough to figure out what directions they were giving me.

Finally, I asked a lady where I was, and she replied: (more…)

(Sigh) Another evening sitting in my room all by myself… I can’t believe no one has called me yet!

Oh, wait – you have no idea what I’m talking about, do you?

Well, I went to a speed dating event last night hoping to land myself a date. I almost didn’t go at first; when my best friend Harry told me about the whole “speed” dating thing, I told him: “Whoa! There is NO way I’m going to be doing drugs while on a date!”

After he explained that “speed” meant “fast,” I decided to give it a shot!

I wanted to be impressive, and wear the absolute best outfit I could – a nice suit jacket with silk pants and a striped tie! Unfortunately, it’s my only suit, and it was still (more…)

Happy Labor Day, everybody!

Okay, so Labor Day was yesterday. Still, if you had a happy one yesterday, I hope you’re still just as happy today – and if not, you probably had too much to drink and are just now waking up in a pool of your own vomit. Good for you!

As for me, my labor day was great! I didn’t get invited to any parties this year (or any other years for that matter), so I did what all of us “rebels” do: I found a party to crash!

I went to a club downtown that was having a “Labor Day Celebration Bash” in the hopes of getting my party on… AND meeting a cute girl. When I got there, I saw so many hot babes that my brain went into overload! Convulsing, dilated pupils, sweaty armpits – and that was just after I tried some of the nacho jalapeño sauce. I hadn’t even started (more…)

After learning about a new dating site this morning, LastChanceDate.com, I thought it would be a GREAT experience to sign up and finally get a date… They say they can match “ANYONE, and I mean ANYONE….”

I decided to video tape myself and let you leave your comments below to tell me what you think???