(Sigh) Another dateless night for me…

Usually I’d be spending this time with my pet hamster Larry, but he’s got a date tonight!  Can you believe it?  My hamster rarely ever leaves its cage, and the one time I forget to close his door, he escapes and manages to meet up with two other hamsters, a gopher, and my mail lady Frieda.  Now he’s got dates booked for the next month with ALL of them!

As for me? The only dates I have lined up are the ones that came with my calendar (and even some of THOSE dates have already canceled)!

It’s okay, though – I don’t have time for dates anyway.  I have other important things I’m working on.  After I’m done typing, I’m going to go clip my toenails and add them to my toenail jar.  I like to keep a collection of them as a reminder of specific times in my life.  For the past 5 weeks I’ve been chasing after this cute girl named Susie (soooo pretty), and yesterday was the first time SHE actually hit on ME!

Well, okay – so technically she slapped me in the face.  I guess I was breathing too much of the oxygen that was surrounding her and it bothered her… but still, the fact that she touched me at all is something that should DEFINITELY be remembered!

Besides, it’s been 5 weeks, and my toenails were starting to get pretty long.  I’ve already scratched holes in 5 pairs of socks and 2 pairs of tennis shoes.  I also flattened a soccer ball when I tried kicking it back to some little kids in the playground.  They got mad, I got chased, and I ended up getting tortured with nipple twisters and Indian skin burns.  Not pretty.

Anyway… I’m off to find a pair of garden shears to cut my nails.  Adios!

-Non Juan

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