Did Nick Cannon Ever ASSUME Mariah Carey Was Unattainable?
Above: Nick Cannon and his wife, Mariah Carey. Did he ever ASSUME he couldn’t have her?
If you’re bad at getting women – I mean really, REALLY bad – it’s not just those women that are sabotaging your efforts.
It may be hard to believe this, but part of the blame can actually be put on YOU, and your low-level assumptions about the women you’re interested in.
Think about this: there are literally BILLIONS of women on this planet, each of which have different quirks, personalities, likes, dislikes, etc.
Of those women, at least half of them are still single, and DESPERATE for a man – ANY MAN – to show them some love and attention.
As you can see, the odds are actually in your FAVOR to score with any girl you may desire. So why is it, then, that you can’t have the girl your heart’s been pining after?
NEGATIVE ASSUMPTIONS.
Chances are, whenever you meet a girl you like, before you even step up to her to say “hi,” you’re already making NEGATIVE ASSUMPTIONS:
- You assume she already has a boyfriend
- You assume she won’t like what you have to say
- You assume she has other things she’d rather be focusing on than meeting you
- You assume you don’t have what it takes to impress her (i.e. car, cash, the right job, etc.)
- You assume that, even if you DID manage to convince her to go on a date with you, it would eventually not work out – so why try in the first place?
All of these assumptions have one thing in common: they are based on the idea that a woman will automatically REJECT you, despite having any actual proof that she will do so.
You may think assumptions like these are your brain’s way of preventing you from a situation where you’ll face humiliating rejection. However, what they actually are is something much more damaging…
THEY ARE THOUGHTS PURPOSEFULLY DESIGNED TO KEEP YOU FROM GETTING INTO A RELATIONSHIP!!
“But Non Juan,” you ask, “why would I want to keep myself out of a relationship! I would LOVE to have a woman to call mine and keep around!”
Oh sure, your conscious mind SAYS all that stuff. But who cares about that when it’s your sub-conscious that’s holding you back!
Ah yes, the sub-conscious – that part of the brain that has emotional memories stored from WAAAAAY back in our past that we hardly think of anymore, yet is responsible for many of the decisions we make.
Do you ever think about WHY you start feeling nervous when a girl you find attractive approaches you? Ever ponder WHY it is you don’t open your mouth and just tell her straight out, “hey, baby, let’s go out sometime?”
Maybe your conscious mind can’t figure it out. However, maybe your sub-conscious remembers the first time a girl found out you had a crush on her, and she laughed at you so hard that your ended up crying your eyes out in front of all your friends.
Yep. That’s right. Your sub-conscious remembers that. And your sub-conscious doesn’t want to feel that humiliation again.
So, rather than go through it, it sends out NEGATIVE ASSUMPTIONS whenever you start crushing on a girl. Assumptions like:
- “Don’t bother saying ‘hi’ to her – she’s only going to laugh about it with her friends later.”
- “That’s it, just let her keep on walking by – don’t let her bring any pain into your life.”
- “Die, scum, die! You’ll never get near ME, you seductive hussy!”
(Oops, sorry. That’s what used to go through MY brain before the Don helped me out.)
At the end of the day, YOU are responsible for the thoughts that run through your brain. If you allow your brain to constantly think up NEGATIVE ASSUMPTIONS every time a girl you like walks into the picture, you’ll continue to LOSE girls.
Think about Nick Cannon. He’s currently married to hot-bombshell singer Mariah Carey. Mrs. Carey is almost 11 years older than Nick – by most guy’s standards, there was NO way he should have been able to get her. Yet because he didn’t make any NEGATIVE ASSUMPTIONS about what bad things could happen by asking her out, he was able to get with her.
More importantly, it was made easier for him because of all the guys who probably DID make those NEGATIVE ASSUMPTIONS and thought, “eh, there’s no way she’d get with me – I don’t have as much money, and I’m much too young for her.” Guess those guys are probably slapping themselves silly right about now – I know I did!
-Non Juan
Non Juan’s book, “The Non Juan’s Guide to LOSING The Girl of Your Dreams: Why Everything Men THINK They Know About Dating is WRONG,” coming soon!
